Sebaik aku menyorong opah yang duduk atas kerusi jamban beroda, ke atas jamban sebenar, opah tiba-tiba bersuara.
Opah: Patutnya ganti dengan orang muda, yang cergas, kuat. Ini tua, lemah.
(Opah menundukkan kepala menunjuk gaya seorang tua yang bongkok)
Aku: (Aii? Aku ni dah tua ke?) Siapa nak diganti? Adib?
Opah: Opah ni elok diganti. Ganti dengan orang muda.
Aku: Ganti macam mana pulak ni?
Opah: Yelah, opah kan duduk di sini. Dah tua, seeloknya bior le orang muda yang duduk di sini.
Aku: Macam mana nak ganti opah? Lepas tu opah ke mana?
Aku tak puas hati. Argument kali ini kalau boleh aku nak tamatkan. Walaupun sebenarnya aku tahu opah sedang merepek dalam dunianya sendiri, aku tak mahu yang ini dibiarkan tergantung. Inilah opah, ingatannya makin luput sejak 3-4 tahun lalu. Dan saspek utamanya, sekuat mana aku cuba menafikan selama ini, adalah Alzheimer's. Aku benci kau Alzheimer.
Kemudian, opah yang masih juga cuba untuk memenangi debat ini, menjawab soalan aku.
Opah: Bior le dia duduk sini, opah pulak menengok.
Aku: (Aku mula ketawa) Dah tu macam mana opah nak berak? Orang tu tukang berakkan?
Opah: (Turut ketawa) Aah. (kemudian sambung dengan bebelan yang aku tak dapat tangkap sebenarnya)
Aku tinggalkan opah, masih ketawa.
Tapi sehinggalah aku sampai di dapur baru aku faham maksud opah. Opah sebenarnya memaksudkan teknologi avatar macam dalam filem Avatar James Cameron itu. Dan aku boleh confirm yang opah tak pernah tengok filem Avatar (kalau nak kata opah tiru idea daripada filem itu).
Power opah, power.
Sunday, February 9, 2014
Monday, February 3, 2014
Film Quotes [3]
image from tshirtvortex.net
Steve: Top side we've got the bridge, the mini sub, an old chopper and all kinds of radar, and sonar and underwater movie gadgets.
Ned: What Happened to Jacqueline?
Steve: She didn't really love me.
Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou, 2004
Saturday, January 25, 2014
Glow
They say that if you eat right and sleep well, not only do you start to lose weight, your skin would even start to glow.
Hey I need that. I've been walking in pitch dark for quite some time now.
Hey I need that. I've been walking in pitch dark for quite some time now.
Friday, January 24, 2014
Film Quotes [2]
"Dear Starbucks, in your attempt to manufacture culture out of fast
food coffee, you’ve been surprisingly successful for the most part. The
part that isn’t covered by ‘the most part’ sucks." - Roger Greenberg
Greenberg, 2010.
Greenberg, 2010.
Thursday, January 23, 2014
Life, and all That Shit.
Professor Emeraldine was about to finish explaining the sand he just poured in a glassbox on his table, as his right hand reached for a cup of coffee. He was telling the story of life, using metaphors.
You know this, everyone knows this. It's the viral chain e-mail, a post on Facebook, or more recently a broadcast message on Whatsapp. You've probably read this story at least once in your life. It's the stuff about life, work, family and all that shit. I can't remember the exact story but it involved a professor explaining life by inserting stuffs like rocks and bricks into a possibly used aquarium, in front of his class. Most probably a philosophy class.
Well here it is, the origin of the story. It all started with Professor Emeraldine, of Feathers McGraw Institute of Technology. He had reached almost the ending of the story. I don't remember what the sand represented. Maybe it was the community, or whatever. Who cares. But at the end, he started pouring coffee into the mix. Two cups of pure arabican americano.
"And what was that?", asked one of his students, Tobias.
This puts a smile to Professor Emeraldine's face. People like him, scholars, academicians, they really like it when people ask them questions. Questions particularly, raised after observing their actions. Questions raised resulting from what they have done. They would purposely keep silent until someone raises a question. Adding to the effect that the response would be something light, probably funny but more importantly something that everyone would not expect given the context of the previous subjects. Work, family and friends for that matter
"That my dear students, means that, no matter how full our life is, there is always a space for some coffee for two."
That answer ignited a mix of noises from the audience. Most chuckled, some blurting monologues. All in all, in a good manner. Except for one.
"No", said Tobias, from the front row. "I mean, that's a waste of some damn good coffee, man"
You know this, everyone knows this. It's the viral chain e-mail, a post on Facebook, or more recently a broadcast message on Whatsapp. You've probably read this story at least once in your life. It's the stuff about life, work, family and all that shit. I can't remember the exact story but it involved a professor explaining life by inserting stuffs like rocks and bricks into a possibly used aquarium, in front of his class. Most probably a philosophy class.
Well here it is, the origin of the story. It all started with Professor Emeraldine, of Feathers McGraw Institute of Technology. He had reached almost the ending of the story. I don't remember what the sand represented. Maybe it was the community, or whatever. Who cares. But at the end, he started pouring coffee into the mix. Two cups of pure arabican americano.
"And what was that?", asked one of his students, Tobias.
This puts a smile to Professor Emeraldine's face. People like him, scholars, academicians, they really like it when people ask them questions. Questions particularly, raised after observing their actions. Questions raised resulting from what they have done. They would purposely keep silent until someone raises a question. Adding to the effect that the response would be something light, probably funny but more importantly something that everyone would not expect given the context of the previous subjects. Work, family and friends for that matter
"That my dear students, means that, no matter how full our life is, there is always a space for some coffee for two."
That answer ignited a mix of noises from the audience. Most chuckled, some blurting monologues. All in all, in a good manner. Except for one.
"No", said Tobias, from the front row. "I mean, that's a waste of some damn good coffee, man"
Saturday, January 18, 2014
Tindakan Klasik
Dalam perbincangan tentang hal melancong di Bali, seorang rakan kami, Saufee (aku sudah ubah namanya menjadi lain daripada nama sebenar. Terlalu lain sehingga susah kalau orang nak meneka), beberapa kali menekankan yang dia tidak akan turut serta jikalau kami ingin singgah ke kuil-kuil di sana. Dia mahu stay in. Duduk bilik, atau rumah, atau whatever.
Classic move, Saufee. Ini mengingatkan aku pada apa yang berlaku pada tahun lepas, kali terakhir dia stay in. Waktu dia berhoneymoon dengan isterinya Maominlon, boleh pulak terkena sengat rambutan laut. Tak boleh berjalan lah, kaki bengkak lah, apa lah, jadi kena lepak dalam bilik. Macam sengaja je disengat.
Sudah hampir setahun benda ni berlaku. Anak dia sekarang dah 2 bulan umurnya.
Classic move, Saufee. Ini mengingatkan aku pada apa yang berlaku pada tahun lepas, kali terakhir dia stay in. Waktu dia berhoneymoon dengan isterinya Maominlon, boleh pulak terkena sengat rambutan laut. Tak boleh berjalan lah, kaki bengkak lah, apa lah, jadi kena lepak dalam bilik. Macam sengaja je disengat.
Sudah hampir setahun benda ni berlaku. Anak dia sekarang dah 2 bulan umurnya.
Friday, January 17, 2014
Merah Kanvas Biru
Dengan satu sentapan di kaki kiri, Mad Mat rebah di atas kanvas anjal selepas diperkenankan skill yang dinamakan sebagai 'Single Leg Takedown' oleh lawannya, Din Matthews. Dengan kedua-duanya rata di atas kanvas, mereka bergelut bergusti, sehingga Din Mathhews mendapat posisi side mount ke atas Mad Mat.
"Real bro, real", bisik Mad Mat ketika sedang separuh daya menepis tumbukan-tumbukan Din Matthews. Din Matthews tidak memberi respon. Dan setelah Mad Mat dapat memegang pergelangan tangan Din Matthews, menghalangnya untuk terus menyerang, Mad Mat mula membisikkan perancangan seterusnya kepada Din Matthews.
"Ok macam ni bro. Sikit lagi, kau tumbuk aku tiga kali, dan pada tumbukan ketiga tu aku akan dapat macam kekuatan. Lepas tu aku pulak tumbuk kau. Kau buat lemah, kita bangun kemudian aku suplek kau sekali dan aku elbow drop kau sekali. Next, kau pulak bagi suggestion. Ok start sekarang.", bisik Mad Mat dalam menggapai nafas.
Din Matthews yang kehairanan dengan apa yang dibisikkan Mad Mat tadi terus menjawab, "Kepala hotak kau!", dan sekaligus memberi dua siku, satu di atas dahi dan satu lagi di belakang telinga Mad Mat, sebelum perlawanan dihentikan oleh pengadil Raof Winters.
Mad Mat pengsan setelah menerima siku kedua tadi. Itu adalah perlawanan Mad Mat yang pertama di dalam kancah UFC selepas berhijrah daripada liga gusti professional, WCW. Itupun atas desakan kawan-kawan. Masalahnya tiada siapa bercerita hal sebenar UFC ini kepada Mad Mat. memang Mad Mat kena game. Friends like these huh?
"Real bro, real", bisik Mad Mat ketika sedang separuh daya menepis tumbukan-tumbukan Din Matthews. Din Matthews tidak memberi respon. Dan setelah Mad Mat dapat memegang pergelangan tangan Din Matthews, menghalangnya untuk terus menyerang, Mad Mat mula membisikkan perancangan seterusnya kepada Din Matthews.
"Ok macam ni bro. Sikit lagi, kau tumbuk aku tiga kali, dan pada tumbukan ketiga tu aku akan dapat macam kekuatan. Lepas tu aku pulak tumbuk kau. Kau buat lemah, kita bangun kemudian aku suplek kau sekali dan aku elbow drop kau sekali. Next, kau pulak bagi suggestion. Ok start sekarang.", bisik Mad Mat dalam menggapai nafas.
Din Matthews yang kehairanan dengan apa yang dibisikkan Mad Mat tadi terus menjawab, "Kepala hotak kau!", dan sekaligus memberi dua siku, satu di atas dahi dan satu lagi di belakang telinga Mad Mat, sebelum perlawanan dihentikan oleh pengadil Raof Winters.
Mad Mat pengsan setelah menerima siku kedua tadi. Itu adalah perlawanan Mad Mat yang pertama di dalam kancah UFC selepas berhijrah daripada liga gusti professional, WCW. Itupun atas desakan kawan-kawan. Masalahnya tiada siapa bercerita hal sebenar UFC ini kepada Mad Mat. memang Mad Mat kena game. Friends like these huh?
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